MY FASTING JOURNEY

One year, many moons ago, at the start of Lent I decided to try fasting for the first time.  I had no idea what I was doing, but something just told me to do this.  I wanted to go the whole 40 days, but I knew I had to put some boundaries on it since I had never done it before.  I decided I would fast for breakfast and lunch, and only allow myself to eat a small bite of food after 6pm.

That first week I thought I would die!!  The hunger pains and caffeine withdrawal from a lack of coffee was unbelievable.  But I told myself when I had hunger pains, no matter where I was, I would stop and pray.  And God and I talked A LOT that first week! I was still working in a secular office back then, and it was hard keeping it from everyone at work and the kids too, but I was determined that I would follow the guidelines in Matthew that say when you fast, it's not about other people looking at you like you are some great spiritual person for fasting, but it's about you and God.  So that is what I made it about - me and God.  We became so close, closer than I had ever been with Him.

And then the devil started doing his work.  During those first few weeks, a vendor brought in donuts, then another vendor brought in bagels, then we had a HUGE food day where the entire 50 person department brought in hot food for breakfast and lunch.  The smell was overwhelming! I thought I would melt in my seat.  Drool was draining from my mouth all day!  And then trying to tell people why I wasn’t going in to get the food was hard.  I kept saying I am coming, I will be there soon, etc. 

Eventually I started losing quite a bit of weight and it became too hard not to say anything.  So I tried to just tell a few people who were very inquisitive.  But here is the interesting thing.  I told them I was fasting to get closer to God.  And that would start a faith conversation, something that wasn’t allowed in a work setting, especially since I was a manager. But I discovered there were lots of folks that had questions about God, which opened up a discussion about faith that I had never had before with people at work. Every day someone would come into my office and ask me a question about God or want to talk about faith - or even ask me to pray for them. 

I made it the entire 40 days.  This was a pivotal event that changed my life forever.  The fast allowed me to grow closer to God in a way that I never had before - because we were talking more than ever.  So when He spoke to me and told me that it was time for a change, I heard Him.  This is what led me to finally quit my secular job and go into ministry full time.

Even though this feels like it was a lifetime ago, I still remember the lessons I learned that year. These may seem obvious but they were not to me at that time.  But they are now and they still apply today:

• 
  People want to talk about faith - all they have to see is that you are open to hearing their questions, are not judgemental, and care about them. 
• 
  People do not understand faith - even those that go to church.  They need us to answer their questions as best we can - and they should know we do not have all the answers - but we can share what we know, and what God means to us. 
• 
  Just like in a marriage or friendship or relationship of any kind, you grow closer the more you talk - your relationship with God is the same way.  The more you talk to Him the closer you get.   

I can’t fast that much anymore but each year I always remember the year I did a full 40 day fast.  And I especially remember the lessons I learned. 

I pray each one of you finds something to fast for Lent, whether it is food or something else significant, and you use this time to grow closer to God.